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Back From Florida

Hubby and I came back from Florida last Wednesday. I can still say we are both not fully settled lol. We were only there for 9 days but man does it really throw me off. This trip was defiantly anything I expected. It really showed me how much I have grown. It tested my patience, anger, self love, and my relationship. I don’t really want to get into every detail but staying with another persons family or friend that I personally have not spent time with before I will not stay with them.

I am actually really happy that it was such a tough trip. I am now on the road AGAIN to my zen. I am bringing nothing but positivity to my life. Before I even take my first step I will be saying my positive mantras. I am calm, cool, and collected. I will not continue to let negativity affect my life.

I am saying it today I WILL LIVE IN South Carolina. I am giving my self the MOST three years. I will be there and I WILL start my family there.

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Energy Suckers & a Revelation

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It’s hard to really protect yourself from all the negative energy and patterns in the world. Even though I try my best to not get sucked in. Some of the people I am forced to spend my time with are very negative and these energy suckers. They wish bad behind your back and spit venom every time they speak about you. They only wish the worse for you and hate to see you succeed. They want to plant seeds of hate and anger in you and help to grow them. I have fallen for traps that they have placed but we can only recognize and grow. I know that I have grown and continue to. About two days ago I woke up feeling brand new. I can’t really explain it but it was like someone shut off my over caring button.

I truthfully just do not care about things that do not affect me. I am surrounding myself with only people that want the best for me. I will only think positive thoughts and partake in positive experiences. I CHOOSE not to be upset, anxious, worried, and anything but happy.

The most important aspect that I have realized is that other peoples opinions and feelings do not have anything to do with me. They do not affect me at all. I also noticed how much better I feel when I don’t say I’m sorry for everything. You know why because I 99% of the time was not truly sorry. Someone else drops something, “oh I’m sorry” someone bumps into me “oh I’m sorry” someone is having a shitty day “oh I’m sorry” nope not anymore. You dropped something? here I’ll pick it up, you’re welcome. someone bumps into me, turn and deep stare until they apologize (lol not really I just keep it moving.) you’re having a shitty day? maybe you’re having the day you deserve.

I am first. And this does sound a little me, me, me but it does not have anything to do nor affect my family and close circle of friends. I will always be me but I will be more selective with who I will let see me.